Addressing the elephant in the room.
It’s not something I ever wanted to address; the subject of eating disorders has nothing to do with my website nor what I stand for, which is why I’ve let the rumors go unchallenged for so long.
But readers have recently been leaving an even higher number of weight-related comments than usual, now calling me both too thin and too fat. (I’ve even been called pregnant and anorexic in the same post.)
As I know girls are using photos of me for “thinspiration” and citing my blog as a reason it’s okay to eat 100 calories a day and starve down to 70 pounds…
I feel addressing it at this point is the right thing to do.
If you’ve ever googled “chocolate covered katie,” you’ve probably seen the search engine’s lovely (I say this facetiously) list of related searches, which includes “chocolate covered katie anorexic” and “chocolate covered katie eating disorder.”
It’s self-perpetuating: curiosity will cause people to click on the terms, and therefore the suggested searches will most likely never disappear.
Although I don’t have an eating disorder and have always eaten well, I did have an unhealthy relationship with exercise in the past that took a toll on both my appearance and mental health.
While I’d thought I was happy during those years and was technically healthy—with normal lab work and a good relationship with food—the over-exercising was sabotaging my efforts to gain the curves I desired. I wouldn’t allow myself to entertain the possibility my running routine could be partially responsible for my inability to gain weight.
When I finally did make the choice to give up running (that story is linked above), I gained about 10-15 pounds quickly, easily, and happily. Imagine discovering, almost overnight, that you suddenly have the body you’d always wanted.
Looking back, I wonder why I didn’t realize sooner the extreme exercise was not the healthiest thing for me: it had become a source of stress in my life and was draining me of energy, which was manifest in my appearance.
I am a million and a half times happier now, and it shows.
It’s difficult to make guesses about a person’s life simply by looking at a photograph or by judging his or her online persona.
No, my life is not all about food; and yes, I occasionally do indulge in “unhealthy” meals and desserts. I just don’t post about these occasions because it isn’t relevant to the theme of my website.
Hateful things are written on the internet under a cloak of anonymity, and it’s unfortunately women putting down other women all too often, writing words they would never feel comfortable saying in real life.
In my years of blogging, I’ve been called everything from “skeleton” to “fat slug” to “anorexic with a boob job” (neither of which is true; but even if they were, would it mean someone had any less worth as a human being?). The comments eventually forced me to realize my self worth needs to come from something other than the opinion of a stranger on the internet.
The routineness with which I receive these acrimonious messages has at least given me the ability to shrug them off.
Although… when I saw the “fat slug” comment, I could not stop laughing.
I completely stopped reading the internet rumors and conspiracy theories about myself a long time ago, even if that means letting some false claims about my life go unchallenged. While I could defend myself against the rumors, doing so would become a full-time job, and I’d rather focus my time elsewhere.
The people who know me in real life are easily able to tell the truth, which is all that matters.
However, the one thing I feel I do need to clear up is that anyone who tells you my blog promotes eating disorders is grossly mistaken. Nothing could be further from the truth.
The Chocolate Covered Recipes have healthy fats, whole grains, and real-food (non-artificial) ingredients, and you’ll never find me promoting dangerous cleanses, calorie restriction, or touting any one food as a “miracle” cure.
I’ve turned down so many high-paying offers from companies to promote such things on the blog.
In consideration of the readers with a medical need, lower-calorie and sugar-free options are included in my posts when available. But the recipes are not specifically “diet” choices; just healthier choices, and you can choose the ingredient options that suit your own personal needs.
I go further into detail on this topic in my Chocolate Covered Katie FAQ Page.
Please, the next time you read any kind of gossip online, take a moment to consider the source before believing it as fact. And if you ever come across something written about me that you don’t understand, please always feel free to ask.
I’m one of the most candid and open people you could ever meet, and I don’t get embarrassed easily. If a stranger really wanted to know everything about my life, I’d have no problem leaving in every detail.
At the risk of sounding clichéd… all of the stupid mistakes I’ve made in my life have made me who I am today, and I’m not embarrassed about a single one.
If you want to use me as thinspiration, keep in mind that the thinspiration you are using is a healthy woman who eats a balanced diet heavy in calories, healthy fats, and carbs.
I’d hope that what people can get out of my blog is the message it’s important to treat your body kindly; to nourish it with real-food ingredients; to truly enjoy the foods you are eating; and to take in enough calories for the strength and energy to live your best life possible.
No crash dieting. No cutting out food groups. No starving. Please take good care of yourselves. ♥
I also wanted to write this post because I know there are many other girls out there (and guys too) who receive similar online comments. To anyone who might need to hear it, please do not take any of the messages you receive to heart.
Most often, people just like to write things online because they can (especially if it’s anonymous), and it has nothing to do with your worth, no matter whether you are underweight, overweight, or have anything else about your physical appearance that makes you feel insecure or less than.
Now, can we put this subject to rest and get back to the food?
I’m going to hashtag this photo #fatslug 
Nicely written article. However, I feel a little disappointed that you ever had to write such an essay.
I stumbled on your Blog when I was searching for healthier snacks and treats for my son. Whether by nature or by nurture, he and I both have a sweet tooth. I love your Blog because there are 100s of great recipes and ideas. I love that you provide alternatives and options for folks with special dietary needs or preferences. I can’t imagine the research that goes into developing all these recipes. Although, I imagine some of the research and tasting must be fun!
You seem like a lovely person, and I think your efforts to share your healthy-eating research is admirable. Thank you!!!
I also understand how exercise can become addictive, especially when one reaches a higher level of fitness. The next challenge is always right down the road, so to speak, and it becomes almost intoxicating to strive for and achieve the next perceived milestone.
Thanks again for your inspiring Blog! I love following your posts.
Now off to try your healthy blueberry muffin recipe…. 🙂
Katie –
You are clearly a strong woman, inside and out. I admire you for your all of your abilities and creativity in the kitchen, but more importantly, I admire you for your courage, determination, and your strength. While, sadly, many of the “haters” will not be swayed by the truth (they have to make up nasty rumors to make themselves feel better about their own unfulfilled lives), but I think your post will inspire girls and young women who are letting their insecurities lead them to unhealthy means of dieting and/or exercise. So many young women look up to you and I applaud you for candor in this post and your previous post when you shared your personal struggles with over-exercising. Every woman, myself included, has issues with her body. Your message, along with your wonderful recipes, is a positive, encouraging one. Keep up the good work! 🙂 And remember, there will always be people out there who are so unhappy with themselves and their lives that they will waste their time judging others they know nothing about. You have countless supporters and cheerleaders who know better than to believe everything they read. 🙂
Dear Katie,
You are a beautiful young woman, and my daughter and I love your “chocolate covered katie” website!!!! What you are doing is a good and wonderful thing: giving us healthier alternatives for foods that we love to eat. We are so glad you are not allowing negative comments to affect you in any other way except to make you laugh!!!! Very good!!!! God bless you and keep you strong, and may you continue to spread love and joy everywhere!
Great post, Katie! Others slam people anonymously because it makes them feel better about themselves. So sad.
As a very healthy, slender woman near 50 years old, I love your blog! It helps me to eat what I want to eat–but without the sugar hangover the next day! I believe that sugar is the most common addictive “drug” of this generation! Those who have learned to wean themselves from it know it truly will give you a hangover if you over-indulge! To me, that is proof that it is addictive and unhealthy.
Thanks for all you do!
katie! I love this. I’ve “read” your blog for years now off and on. I say “read” because basically I’m a slacker and only come for recipe inspiration before dashing away again. But, i do get your newsletter so I often see the title of the email even if I don’t read it all, and I knew that like me you were a big runner. Around the same time that you stopped running I was going through something similar. My runs had stopped being enjoyable and instead had become a chore that I felt forced to do 4-6 mornings a week. I always ran for around an hour and that usually covered 6-8 miles. However, unlike you, I was definitely NOT eating enough and over time my body was starting to show signs of my metabolism slowing down and just general unhealthiness. For a long time I prided myself on how healthy i was; i’ve been a vegan for something like 7 years (and only cared about health aspects for the last 5), i exercised regularly, i was strong, i ate the cleanest diet of anyone that i knew/know, but at some point it went awry. somewhere along the way running became a compulsion and i began eating less and less. Eventually, I reached out to a dietician who instructed me to stop running and to begin eating far more than I was at the time (and frankly, more than i’ve been able to work up to yet). It’s been a real challenge for me. Despite not enjoying running anymore it still provided some huge sense of accomplishment for me sooooo often. I think it’s really brave of you to talk openly about the unhealthy relationship that you had developed with exercise because it’s something that people often overlook; so good for you! And lastly, anyone that accuses you of an ED is absurd. I’ve often wished I could eat as many of your wonderful desserts as you and be so thin, but it was always abundantly clear that you weren’t suffering from an unhealthy relationship with food. I think a lot of times those of us with eating disorders often envy women that are even thinner and we project our own negativity onto them. You’ve done nothing wrong, and your critics need to take a step back and look inward.
You handled this beautifully, Katie. Don’t let those awful things people cowardly say online to mess with your self-worth. And thank you for reminding everyone that those nasty comments people throw around online should be taken with a grain of salt – it’s impossible for us to really know any blogger whom we’ve never met in person. Keep being you, girl!
Nicely written! I’m so sorry you’ve been called mean names, that’s awful! I have food allergies, I know I can always stop by your blog and find something sweet to eat. Thank you for making delicious recipes and sharing them! (Proverbs 16:24) -Amber
Been following your blog for years, and love this post so much. Thank you for your honesty, it’s so refreshing and inspiring. Congrats on all of your success with CCK. Even though I don’t know you, proud of you lol. All the best and continued happiness 😀 xoxo
You are so brave! People are SO mean and say such hurtful things to others. Thank you for standing up to what is essentially cyber bullying and keeping up your business. You are so strong! I would have quit.
Thanks for being beautiful you!!! Xo
Thanks for sharing Katie! I think you are wonderful, and I appreciate how your posts are always upbeat and positive (in addition to providing delicious desserts).