Addressing the elephant in the room.
It’s not something I ever wanted to address; the subject of eating disorders has nothing to do with my website nor what I stand for, which is why I’ve let the rumors go unchallenged for so long.
But readers have recently been leaving an even higher number of weight-related comments than usual, now calling me both too thin and too fat. (I’ve even been called pregnant and anorexic in the same post.)
As I know girls are using photos of me for “thinspiration” and citing my blog as a reason it’s okay to eat 100 calories a day and starve down to 70 pounds…
I feel addressing it at this point is the right thing to do.
If you’ve ever googled “chocolate covered katie,” you’ve probably seen the search engine’s lovely (I say this facetiously) list of related searches, which includes “chocolate covered katie anorexic” and “chocolate covered katie eating disorder.”
It’s self-perpetuating: curiosity will cause people to click on the terms, and therefore the suggested searches will most likely never disappear.
Although I don’t have an eating disorder and have always eaten well, I did have an unhealthy relationship with exercise in the past that took a toll on both my appearance and mental health.
While I’d thought I was happy during those years and was technically healthy—with normal lab work and a good relationship with food—the over-exercising was sabotaging my efforts to gain the curves I desired. I wouldn’t allow myself to entertain the possibility my running routine could be partially responsible for my inability to gain weight.
When I finally did make the choice to give up running (that story is linked above), I gained about 10-15 pounds quickly, easily, and happily. Imagine discovering, almost overnight, that you suddenly have the body you’d always wanted.
Looking back, I wonder why I didn’t realize sooner the extreme exercise was not the healthiest thing for me: it had become a source of stress in my life and was draining me of energy, which was manifest in my appearance.
I am a million and a half times happier now, and it shows.
It’s difficult to make guesses about a person’s life simply by looking at a photograph or by judging his or her online persona.
No, my life is not all about food; and yes, I occasionally do indulge in “unhealthy” meals and desserts. I just don’t post about these occasions because it isn’t relevant to the theme of my website.
Hateful things are written on the internet under a cloak of anonymity, and it’s unfortunately women putting down other women all too often, writing words they would never feel comfortable saying in real life.
In my years of blogging, I’ve been called everything from “skeleton” to “fat slug” to “anorexic with a boob job” (neither of which is true; but even if they were, would it mean someone had any less worth as a human being?). The comments eventually forced me to realize my self worth needs to come from something other than the opinion of a stranger on the internet.
The routineness with which I receive these acrimonious messages has at least given me the ability to shrug them off.
Although… when I saw the “fat slug” comment, I could not stop laughing.
I completely stopped reading the internet rumors and conspiracy theories about myself a long time ago, even if that means letting some false claims about my life go unchallenged. While I could defend myself against the rumors, doing so would become a full-time job, and I’d rather focus my time elsewhere.
The people who know me in real life are easily able to tell the truth, which is all that matters.
However, the one thing I feel I do need to clear up is that anyone who tells you my blog promotes eating disorders is grossly mistaken. Nothing could be further from the truth.
The Chocolate Covered Recipes have healthy fats, whole grains, and real-food (non-artificial) ingredients, and you’ll never find me promoting dangerous cleanses, calorie restriction, or touting any one food as a “miracle” cure.
I’ve turned down so many high-paying offers from companies to promote such things on the blog.
In consideration of the readers with a medical need, lower-calorie and sugar-free options are included in my posts when available. But the recipes are not specifically “diet” choices; just healthier choices, and you can choose the ingredient options that suit your own personal needs.
I go further into detail on this topic in my Chocolate Covered Katie FAQ Page.
Please, the next time you read any kind of gossip online, take a moment to consider the source before believing it as fact. And if you ever come across something written about me that you don’t understand, please always feel free to ask.
I’m one of the most candid and open people you could ever meet, and I don’t get embarrassed easily. If a stranger really wanted to know everything about my life, I’d have no problem leaving in every detail.
At the risk of sounding clichéd… all of the stupid mistakes I’ve made in my life have made me who I am today, and I’m not embarrassed about a single one.
If you want to use me as thinspiration, keep in mind that the thinspiration you are using is a healthy woman who eats a balanced diet heavy in calories, healthy fats, and carbs.
I’d hope that what people can get out of my blog is the message it’s important to treat your body kindly; to nourish it with real-food ingredients; to truly enjoy the foods you are eating; and to take in enough calories for the strength and energy to live your best life possible.
No crash dieting. No cutting out food groups. No starving. Please take good care of yourselves. ♥
I also wanted to write this post because I know there are many other girls out there (and guys too) who receive similar online comments. To anyone who might need to hear it, please do not take any of the messages you receive to heart.
Most often, people just like to write things online because they can (especially if it’s anonymous), and it has nothing to do with your worth, no matter whether you are underweight, overweight, or have anything else about your physical appearance that makes you feel insecure or less than.
Now, can we put this subject to rest and get back to the food?
I’m going to hashtag this photo #fatslug 
I’m in recovery from anorexia and bulimia and I just want to say that your blog is in no way a thinspiration blog. In fact, it’s one of a few blogs that helped me to concentrate on healthy foods and enjoy nice food again without the guilt. And yes, you show calories. But they’ve helped me too as I know what I’m getting and then it’s less scary. And I know each calorie is healthy. So your blog has been a godsend in my recovery. If people are taking it the wrong way, that’s sad and I’m sorry if that does bother you. But you’re also helping and inspiring many. xxx
That really means a lot to me! So glad!!
What a great post Katie, I love all of your recipes and have never once suspected that you mistreated your body, you’re beautiful! Now, as a fellow fair-skinned girl I DO want to know what kind of foundation you use, your makeup is flawless!
Thank you for writing this, Katie- this was wonderfully, bravely written!! I love your website, both for the delicious recipes and for the personal stories that you choose to share with your readers. Today’s entry really resonates with me, and I appreciate you addressing the importance of eating the right kind of calories instead of starving oneself, as that lesson was something that took me some time to learn, but I am now happier and so much healthier now that I have learned it! 🙂
i think you look fantastic, and think your recipes truly depict healthy eating. good for you to ignore the haters. they should have no affect on how you feel about yourslef. love your attitude and your website!
p.s. your healthy “betterfingers” are my all time favorite, black bean brownies second favorite. i brought your brownies and a tray of duncan hines to a party, clearly labeled… yours were gone long before the others! next time i’ll serve them with whipped coconut cream.
love you, katie!
Thank you so much for making them!!
Katie, I love some of your dessert ideas! I am sorry you have to defend yourself against such harsh critics… it amazes me how some people can easily be called out as too skinny or unhealthy by others, but to call someone f-a-t is like a crime! Regardless, keep up the good work… there will always be insecure folks that try to bring others down, but you don’t have to feel victim to it… ♡
Hi Katie,
This post was my first read. I’ll definitely be coming back for more. I’m sorry you felt you needed to write this post but also glad you handled it so well. Bravo!
Kudos to you!!! So well written and inspirational. I haven’t known of any of the controversy..just really enjoy your well written, great, healthy food blog! Keep it up. You really are an inspiration!
Its a shame that you have to publicly say these things & defend yourself. I love your website & recipes because as a diabetic with many food intolerances (& a dessert lover of course!!!) I can indulge without affecting my health. Who cares what size you are? Your website is a godsend to me and your beautiful smile makes me smile when I see your photos. People need to spend more time cooking & eating your recipes than commenting on what you look like and then they would have gorgeous big smiles like you! 😀 Keep up your wonderful work & terrific photos Katie! xxx
Katie-what a wonderfully well-written and brave post. I love your recipes, they have put such a fun spin on baking for me. I understand if you don’t want to answer this, but I at least want to ask. I saw your reply to a previous comment that you still run once every two weeks-or therabouts. As someone who is working on an addiction to exercise-specifically running, do you have any tips for running here and there without letting it take control of your life again? Thanks again for your wonderful example in the food and vegan community.
I can definitely try and write a post about it sometime… But I think, for me, just knowing how amazing my life is now is enough incentive to never want to go back. I thought I was a happy person before and was enjoying life, but I had no idea how much richer it could be.
I would love to read a blog post about it. 🙂 Thanks for replying.
and it’s completely unnecessary to be thin to be healthy.
Namaste Katie, I love you.
As always, you are so right 🙂
My great grandmother was quite overweight her entire adult life… she lived to be almost 100 years old! No stress, and she enjoyed good food and a good life.
Not sure which rock I’ve been living under, but I’ve been following your blog and loving you and your recipes for years and I honestly had no idea that this whole anorexia rumor even existed. And I honestly never even considered that you might have an eating disorder or that you might be doing or promoting something unhealthy. You’re great, Katie. I recommend your site to my friends all the time, and I’m making your chocolate protein bars for the first time tonight (super excited because they’re gonna be delicious!)! Oh, and “fat slug” IS hilarious 🙂 I like you even more now. Aloha!
Same here! I’ve never seen that stuff either. I guess because when we want to look at her recipes we just go straight to the website 🙂
Now that I’m reading this…I do remember seeing “anorexic” or something flash across the screen during a search for one of your recipes. I thought nothing of it; I like your blog, your recipes rock, and that was all that mattered. It’s unfortunate that people use the anonymity of the internet to bash one another/stir up drama. You are intelligent and pretty; I can only think the negative comments come from a place of jealousy. Everyone has things they struggle with and I applaud your willingness to share with your readers. Keep your head up and keep those awesome + creative recipes coming! 🙂
You’re such a role model! I’ve been making your recipes ever since I went vegan a few years ago. Because they’re delicious, not because I think it’s diet food! And knowing that you’ve turned down offers from companies trying to sell their “miracle” food is admirable and makes me love your blog even more!
And I know this is also off-topic of what your blog is all about…. but would you mind sharing where you got those adorable dresses? I don’t think you could be dressed any cuter if you tried!
🙂
The green dress is American Eagle. It was like %60 off, and I could not resist. The other is actually an apron. I think it was maybe Sur la Table.
I’m so glad you wrote this post! My sister has a really high metabolism and was frequently accused of being anorexic in high school. I wish women would stop comparing themselves to each other and picking on each other.
XOXO
Ruth
I’m sorry you’ve been so judged. It’s ridiculous the amount of time people take to verbally attack others. Most comments stem from a lack of confidence, unfortunately. You’re beautiful without even takin into consideration your physical measurements and weight. Congratulations on your blog and your ability to overcome the massive mountain you did when facing over exercising. You should be really proud of yourself!
This is a fascinating post. Thoughts about Anorexia hadn’t even crossed my mind Katie. I just follow your blog and have never Googled you, there’s no need to, so I hadn’t seen that list of related searches. In fact, when I tried it just now, the list of related searches included ‘mug cake’, ‘black bean brownies’ and ‘banana bread’. Nothing else, honest…!
In my experience, the ‘Anorexic’ charge is often used spitefully by people who have the opposite problem, i.e. eating far too much. My advice is to ignore them as it is their insecurity talking. You can be sure that if I stumbled across any of those posts or comments on the web, I would see those comments for what they were….
You look great to me Katie and I love your blog.
What chocolate covered delights have you got for us next…?
I’m trying to decide whether to post buckeye brownies or nutella frozen yogurt. 🙂
Ooh! I vote buckeye brownies! Those sound delish!