I’ve been meaning to write this post about why I gave up running for a while…
Although it’s completely unrelated to healthy desserts or recipes, I wanted to publish in case it can help someone out there who might feel like I did a few months ago.
If you were to stumble upon my blog without knowing anything else about me, you might get a picture of this crazy-enthusiastic girl who is always happy, completely carefree, and whose life revolves around food and chocolate and dessert 24/7.
In reality, “blog Katie” is only a very small portion of who I am outside of the computer world.
You might be surprised by how much of my life is entirely unrelated to food and cooking, and I’m definitely not completely carefree.
Related: How I Started Blogging Full Time
Because I choose not to talk about my friends, relationships, or personal life on the blog, most people would’ve had no idea I was anything less than my usual upbeat self early this year…
Yet even as I continued with the cheery chocolate posts, I was feeling overwhelmed and exhausted thanks to moving twice, going through a breakup, sorting out issues with the book, and worrying about the future.
In the past, I would have leaned on running to get me through.
It was in college that I first fell in love with the sport, waking up each day excited to get out in the fresh Pennsylvania air before classes. Running provided an outlet for the pent-up energy I was no longer expending on soccer and tennis (sports I’d played almost from birth all the way through high school), and I could think about everything while I ran: school, friends, guys, the past, the future… or sometimes nothing at all.
Running’s meaning in my life would change over the years; when I moved back to Texas it became a comforting source of stability in my crazy and uncertain post-high-school life. Four or five times a week, sun or rain or snow, I’d be out there running, 7 to 10 miles each time. I loved it.
But somehow this past summer, I lost energy and motivation for something that used to bring such joy and excitement. For the first time in eight years, I found myself dreading the idea of going out for a run.
I would drag myself through the miles and arrive home feeling completely drained. Running had never been something I wanted to force myself to do, so one day in early July when I was “supposed” to go out, I just didn’t.
That one day turned into a week.
The week turned into a month.
Then two months.
And I was surprised to find I didn’t miss it. I had much more energy throughout the day, felt happier and less stressed, and even my hair—no longer breaking off from much-too-tight ponytails—looked healthier.
As people have pointed out in a few of my recent posts, I’ve also gained weight, which I’d been trying to do for awhile (I always wanted curves). Not going to lie, I am pretty excited about this.
(To ease your worries if you want to give up running but do not wish to gain weight: I don’t think quitting running directly caused me to gain weight. My personality is such that I naturally tend to lose weight when I’m stressed and overwhelmed, so the change is a physical manifestation of feeling happier and more relaxed.)
Will I ever go back to running?
Maybe someday in the future, but much more recreationally.
If running works for you, that’s great. Keep doing it! But if you’re feeling burned out by running—or any exercise—it might be a good idea to take a step back for awhile. You can always pick it up again if the desire strikes.
That’s not to say I’m advocating giving up exercise completely: I still walk every morning to get out in the fresh air, and lately I’ve been going with a friend to the gym a few times a week (basically he lifts all the heavy weights and I stand there with my 10-lb dumbbells and exercise my mouth!).
When I first gave up running, I feared losing a part of my identity. But the truth is I now have so much more.
2014 Edit: Part Two: Why I Started Running Again
Recipe Of The Day:
Flourless Pancakes – 3 Ingredients, NO gluten, soy, eggs, or refined sugar
Thank you for sharing your story! I am going through something similar. I have always loved running. The last few years, however, it has drained my energy and lowered my immunity. This has been rather puzzling, as I am a very health-conscious vegan, and I eat mostly whole plant foods rather than processed food. Today, my doctor told me that my thyroid gland is not functioning properly (hyperthyroidism), so I will need to see an endocrinologist for further testing. I have also asked to be tested for celiac disease, which can develop later in life, even though I tested negative for it in my early thirties. (Patients with hyperthyroidism often have celiac disease. Once gluten is removed from the diet, thyroid function may improve.) Anyway, I think this issue with my thyroid may explain why running has been too much for me. I am sharing my story in the hope that it may help you or others. Take care, sister! And I loved your pumpkin pancake recipe–delish!
As a much older person, I know of many young people who have gone through, or are going through the same soul-searching and life changes as you are. Actually, it is quite normal to find that, what made you excited and happy when younger, is no longer adequate. It’s part of an examined life and a is positive thing.
I don’t want to sound like an old granny (which I am) but I’m glad to see that you are gaining a bit of weight. I had seen a picture of you getting pumpkins and was surprised at how very slim you looked. And curves are fun! 🙂
I enjoy your blog and recipes immensely and think you have a very inventive, original, and quick mind. Your “redos” of old favorites is a wonderful way to introduce family and friends to healthier eating. If a dessert can be made healthier AND tastes great, then half of the battle of getting people to like healthier foods is won!
Keep examining your life and you will never grow to be a dull person! And, keep up the good work!
Katie,
SO many of your blog posts and recipes have been exactly what I’m looking for. Today, I woke up and did not go running, a choice I’ve been tending to make since graduating six months ago. I learned to love running in college–nothing felt better after a stressful day than putting in 8 miles. But, I have not been able to pin point exactly why the running has stopped; then I read this post and it made me smile. Once again, you’ve expressed your experiences in a way that parallels my own. Thank you for giving unexpressed thoughts a voice!
I have yet to comment on your blog, but I just had to today. I love this post for so many reasons, but what stuck out to me most was when you described your love for “peanut butter and coconut oil.” I always had the same love, so much so that I developed my own nut butter line and all of my flavors use – you guessed it – coconut oil:) I think you’d like the “honey vanilla-bourbon peanut butter” best:) Check it out (http://alovingspoon.com/store/products/honey-vanilla-bourbon-peanut-butter-2/) I must get you some when I launch nationwide:)
I needed this, thank you Katie <3 While I still feel passionate about running, due to everything else in my life I simply don't have time to run outside anymore (plus it's -20C or lower every day in the winter!) and so you've reassured me that not running won't kill me 😉 Congratulations on realizing this Katie – I definitely noticed how happy and glowing you look since around the time you said you stopped running ! 🙂
Hi Katie, Love your recipes!!
It sounds like you are saying that you “eat 1/3 of a jar of the oil/nut butter mixture each morning”. But I’m thinking, you make that recipe, and eat a spoonful in the AM?
I don’t want to go off and start eating 2-3 jars a week, lol, if I am messing up your blog! Your Chocolates thrill us all.
Katie, I commend you for your honesty in this post. The Internet is such a vicious world filled with both snarky and disordered people; the normalcy of this post was refreshing. Good for you–living your life in a way that makes you healthy and happy and sharing that with your readers. I truly hope that your lifestyle change will have a positive impact on someone else.
Kudos to you Katie! I love your website and now gotta say I love your attitude!! My latest personal mantra is “challenge is opportunity… WELCOME CHANGE!”
Props to you. Your resilience and flexibility are a real inspiration.
Hi Katie,
I wanted to thank you for sharing your story – it made me feel better about making the same decision really recently. I’ve always been an avid runner and exerciser, I love to be physically active. But after starting medical school last year, running went from something that was a de-stressor to one of a myriad of tasks I had to complete or risk feeling the guilt of “letting myself down”. After a really difficult year of 14 hour school days spent running around the hospital, studying well into the night, and fielding concerns about my relationships falling to the wayside, I realized that I deserved to spend my free time recuperating and enjoying the company of my loved ones, not punishing myself in the gym.
Since I stopped running I have had more energy to be a better student, partner and friend. I’ve also been able to regain some of the weight that I stressed off (not intentionally – I’m small-framed to begin with)
I’m all for exercise; I still do some strength training and I am constantly on my feet otherwise. But you’re right – there comes a point where mental health and balance is more important. Its taken me a while to rectify the guilt of giving up my regime, but this is definitely helping.
Thank you again,
D.
exercise should reduce stress, not create it! if a routine is no longer enjoyable, it’s better to do something else instead. no one says you have to stick to one thing forever, everyone gets burned out!
that’s why i love this post!
Hey Katie,
I’ve been a long time reader of your blog but never commented. I just wanted to let you know that your words were exactly what I need to read today and thank you so much for writing this. =) I’m so happy to hear you’re feeling better and happier now!
All the best,
AM
I read your blog regularly but don’t generally comment (mostly because I figure you have so many comments you don’t need more!). However, I am really grateful to you for sharing this post. I think it’s important people don’t run themselves to death (figuratively, but in some cases also literally) when they rely on the activity for stress management. Sometimes, enough is enough!
I love your posts but I mainly lurk.
I am about 4 months out of a traumatic breakup after 6 years – exercise isn’t something I am leaning on but I am using it to improve my self image (he cheated, it took quite a knock). I am not doing it to lose weight. I am doing it to be healthy and strong.
You don’t always need to be happy, but on the flip side, do what makes you happy.
Love your blog, I hope things get better!
xx
It’s really important to change your exercise routine periodically so you don’t get bored or burned out. Plus, your body will get used to it, so you have to change it up. AND for those ladies looking for curves, lift weights. Seriously. You can’t be afraid of weights, get that body builder image out of your mind. Weights are how you get those toned curves. I look to this website to satisfy my sweet tooth without sabotaging my results.
Proud of you! Thanks so much for sharing this story. It may not have to do with your cooking, which is why all of us read your blog in the first place, but it’s really refreshing to see that you truly do advocate self-care in this way. I, too, had to give up running, and dealt with some overwhelming feelings of guilt, especially when my friends all kept talking about it. This makes me feel proud that I did what was right for my body, and I know that I’m not in these sort of circumstances alone!
I really appreciate your honest post, I know it rang true with me. I’ve done a lot of social dancing for years, salsa and swing, and recently it’s been less appealing for some reason. I go occasionally, but I used to dance 3-4 times a week. Recently I’ve been getting into running actually, as a new alternative.
Keep your chin up, and good for you for trying new things!