Today’s post is very personal, so if you don’t like that sort of thing, feel free to skip it.
In my red velvet pancake post, last week, I brought up heart health and how it’s important to take care of one’s heart. What I didn’t mention was:
I once took my own heart for granted.
Awhile back, I wrote a post about my weight and diet.
The post briefly referred to a time when I overdid it on the running while simultaneously—and accidentally–underdoing it on the eating. But I never elaborated much on what happened. Since I’m trying to be more personal on the blog, I thought I should tell more of the story, especially so none of you ever take your hearts for granted like I did:
It was in high school. I was big into athletics, playing both varsity soccer and tennis. As soon as I started running, I was hooked on that too.
But nobody remembered to tell me just how many calories athletes burn.
At this time in my life, I knew nothing about nutrition, was always running from one activity to another, and would eat whatever I could get my hands on when I had a rare free moment…
Of course, I’d also *just* switched to a vegan diet, which meant I was inadvertently taking in fewer calories simply because I’d fill up on bulky foods.
I didn’t realize I was losing weight—weight I couldn’t afford to lose—until people started taking my mom aside and asking if I was okay. She hadn’t noticed either; when you see someone every day, it’s hard to notice a gradual change. She appeased their fears by answering, “Oh, Katie’s just like I was as a kid: always eating, never gaining an ounce. Who knows where it all goes?!” But as more and more people continued to approach her, we had to face facts: something wasn’t right.
We booked an appointment with the pediatrician, who confirmed I’d lost a lot of weight. But then she also told me something else: My heart rate was extremely low, as was my blood pressure. I’d never heard the words bradycardia or hypotension before, but just the mention of such grandiose medical terms terrified me. (I think, if I remember correctly, my resting heart rate was 42 bpm.) The pediatrician referred me to a cardiologist.
That week between doctor visits was the scariest of my life. Imagine having to go about your daily routine, focusing on fractions and friends, worried all the while that you might have a dangerous heart defect. Obviously, I wasn’t running at this point; in fact, I was afraid to move at all. I was even afraid to go to sleep at night!
Finally, the day of the cardiology appointment arrived. After performing an EKG, they stuck a bunch of stickers on me, squirted some freezing-cold blue gel on a probe, and rubbed the gel around my stomach for half an hour. Then, after what seemed like hours of waiting (because I was so nervous), the cardiologist came in.
Turns out my low heart rate wasn’t a problem. (Athletes often have heart rates in the 40s. Even now, mine is usually in the low 50s.) But the doctor did advise me to gain back the weight I’d lost before I started running again; I’d been feeling sluggish and dizzy, and my low blood pressure #s were troublesome.
Happy ending: I took their advice, got healthy, and when I came in for my follow-up, six months later, the doctor told me I could even run a marathon if I so desired. (Thanks anyway, doc. I did not so desire.)
The reason I’ve never shared this before with is because I was embarrassed to admit how I took my health for granted and risked doing serious damage simply due to lack of proper care of my body. But I’m smarter for it– if I feel like something isn’t right, I won’t ever ignore it again like I did with the dizziness, sluggishness, and friends’ voiced concerns in high school.
My body is amazing, and that’s why I honor it every single day: with healthy foods (but only if they’re also delicious), with enjoyable exercise, and–above all–with plenty of good-quality rest.
Edit: Yes, I know there are a lot of disgusting rumors circulating about me online. For my own sanity, I’ve blocked some of the worst gossip sites so I can’t look at what the trolls are saying anymore. The rumors I saw in the past were either half-truths or (more often) full-blown, hurtful, and seriously ridiculous lies made up by people who have never even met me. There’s not a way to edit the stuff said on other sites—and it’s a free country so people have a right to say what they want. But please remember to consider the source when you read something. Anyone can say anything online, but that doesn’t make it true. If you’re ever wondering about something, just ask. I’m not trying to be devious or hide anything in my life.
(And yes, I know a lot of people are finding this page because Google decided to give out “chocolate covered katie anorexic” and “chocolate covered katie eating disorder” as suggested search terms. Unfortunately I can’t do anything about that either; it’s self-perpetuating. People are always going to click on it out of curiosity.)
I know it’s hard to be completely “out there” on your blog and I’m always so impressed with people who manage to do this and maintain their dignity and grace. Katie, you are such a remarkable young lady. I hope you continue to write what you want to write about, even if it’s difficult. Your readers will only love you more for it.
Katie, you should never be embarrassed to share things about yourself! These events define who you are and have become and we all love you for it!
I’m so glad you’re better, I can only imagine how scary that must have been at such a young age. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned my story in any of our previous messages but I went through a health scare at 21 with my gallbladder and also lost of ton of weight PLUS felt horrible. And it’s terrifying at that age (yes even 21) because I was still naive and young and up to that point had taken my health for granted. I had never had to pay attention to my body or health or how to take care of it because everything just ran by itself so smoothly. Until something like this happens you take it all for granted, especially as a child, thinking you will live forever. I was terrified, I had no idea what was wrong with me, or how to make it better. I felt guilty because my friends and family were so afraid for me and even questioned myself thinking maybe I had done something wrong, I hadn’t taken care of myself, etc.
At the time it was the worst thing that could have happened to me, but now I know that it’s part of what has shaped me. I’ll never take my health for granted again, my body or my ability to enjoy day to day life.
I’m also happy that you have found a way to continue doing a sport you love while eating a diet rich in foods that you love to support it! Can’t wait for more nut butters!
Katie thank you for sharing your story! It was great to learn and little more about you. And of course, Im so glad everything turned out to be ok!
Thanks so much for sharing, Katie. I can’t even imagine how brave you gotta be to put such personal stuff up when you know how many people read. Not that I think you have anything to be ashamed of with this story at all! Thanks for caring enough about your many readers to put your true self out there for us.
Great post, especially in light of it being National Heart Health Month :).
Hi Katie
Thanks for sharing, I think we’re all guilty of taking our health for granted and not appreciating what incredible machines our bodies are. My mum recently had s 7.5 cm benign tumour removed from inside her heart to say it was a roller coaster would be an under statement
Wow I can’t even imagine how scary it must’ve been to not know for a whole week! But I guess you could find comfort in knowing that if your doctor really had felt it was dangerous, she would’ve sent you right away. Still, medical mistakes happen often, and it’s always better to be safe than sorry.
I’m glad that you shared this story. I’m even gladder that you were able to take the doctors advise and bring yourself back to health.
I always find it nice for bloggers to share a bit about their past especially ones that brought a bad time for them. Most of the time these stories they end up stronger and learning from it. It’s nice because other people can also learn from the stories. So thank you and maybe someday someone will come across this story and realize not to do what you did and save them self a doctor trip.
oh katie, i can so relate! well except my health scares hve been all my own doing, because of my eating disorder, but really that’s a disease so also not my fault, but just like you i feel embarrassed to have taken my health for granted and sometimes i still do. we are so lucky that our bodies are nicer to us than we are to them!
thanks for sharing. it makes me feel better and less alone.
lots of love!
Thank you for sharing. Life is a journey and we learn as we go! I’m just so glad that you are okay and are sharing this important information with all of us!
wow- that IS scary!! glad to see everything is doing better! what we we do without our chocolate-loving katie!?! :0)
p.s… tried your single-lady cookie the other day- yummy! someone in my house said it smelled good- why didn’t I make more? haha
thanks!
Yayyayyay! I’m so glad you tried it! lol I actually am not a fan of the single lady cookies… because I never only want one cookie. So I “fixed” the recipe to make a bigger batch hehe :).
Interesting that just this morning I was thinking how I take my health for granted. My body cooperates with everything, it’s great. Some years ago I was midst a one-week fast and I remember I was lying on the bed and listening to my heart. Would it stop beating or would it continue? What to do if I notice it starts beating less frequently? Should I breath harder just to make it pump stronger? Instead I was just lying and listening to it. It didn’t stop lol but it was beating very slowly.
My heart beats slowly too since I do lots of sports, about 60 rpm right now but when I’m lying, even less.
Great post! Thanks for sharing something so personal about yourself!
I’m really small too and have been dealing with an Eating disorder for about a year now….trying to gain back weight now! Do you have any weight gain advice?
Hey Gen!
I hesitate to give weight gain advice, since peoples’ bodies are so different and react so differently to foods/calories/what have you. Also, I’d be afraid of saying the wrong thing and hurting instead of helping. All I can say is be sure to look to calorie-dense foods so you don’t feel super-full all the time trying to get in enough calories. 🙂
Great post, Katie. And well-written as always. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks for sharing! I kind of went through the same thing this past year. I was gettin ultra comppetitive without realizing I needed more calories. I lost some weight but enough to lose my period. Now that i’ve gained most of it back, I still need to be on a pill to kick start it :/ oh well live and learn
it’s so easy to take good health for granted. i’m sorry you had a scare, but i’m very glad you take care of yourself now. thank you for telling us 🙂