Today’s post is very personal, so if you don’t like that sort of thing, feel free to skip it.
In my red velvet pancake post, last week, I brought up heart health and how it’s important to take care of one’s heart. What I didn’t mention was:
I once took my own heart for granted.
Awhile back, I wrote a post about my weight and diet.
The post briefly referred to a time when I overdid it on the running while simultaneously—and accidentally–underdoing it on the eating. But I never elaborated much on what happened. Since I’m trying to be more personal on the blog, I thought I should tell more of the story, especially so none of you ever take your hearts for granted like I did:
It was in high school. I was big into athletics, playing both varsity soccer and tennis. As soon as I started running, I was hooked on that too.
But nobody remembered to tell me just how many calories athletes burn.
At this time in my life, I knew nothing about nutrition, was always running from one activity to another, and would eat whatever I could get my hands on when I had a rare free moment…
Of course, I’d also *just* switched to a vegan diet, which meant I was inadvertently taking in fewer calories simply because I’d fill up on bulky foods.
I didn’t realize I was losing weight—weight I couldn’t afford to lose—until people started taking my mom aside and asking if I was okay. She hadn’t noticed either; when you see someone every day, it’s hard to notice a gradual change. She appeased their fears by answering, “Oh, Katie’s just like I was as a kid: always eating, never gaining an ounce. Who knows where it all goes?!” But as more and more people continued to approach her, we had to face facts: something wasn’t right.
We booked an appointment with the pediatrician, who confirmed I’d lost a lot of weight. But then she also told me something else: My heart rate was extremely low, as was my blood pressure. I’d never heard the words bradycardia or hypotension before, but just the mention of such grandiose medical terms terrified me. (I think, if I remember correctly, my resting heart rate was 42 bpm.) The pediatrician referred me to a cardiologist.
That week between doctor visits was the scariest of my life. Imagine having to go about your daily routine, focusing on fractions and friends, worried all the while that you might have a dangerous heart defect. Obviously, I wasn’t running at this point; in fact, I was afraid to move at all. I was even afraid to go to sleep at night!
Finally, the day of the cardiology appointment arrived. After performing an EKG, they stuck a bunch of stickers on me, squirted some freezing-cold blue gel on a probe, and rubbed the gel around my stomach for half an hour. Then, after what seemed like hours of waiting (because I was so nervous), the cardiologist came in.
Turns out my low heart rate wasn’t a problem. (Athletes often have heart rates in the 40s. Even now, mine is usually in the low 50s.) But the doctor did advise me to gain back the weight I’d lost before I started running again; I’d been feeling sluggish and dizzy, and my low blood pressure #s were troublesome.
Happy ending: I took their advice, got healthy, and when I came in for my follow-up, six months later, the doctor told me I could even run a marathon if I so desired. (Thanks anyway, doc. I did not so desire.)
The reason I’ve never shared this before with is because I was embarrassed to admit how I took my health for granted and risked doing serious damage simply due to lack of proper care of my body. But I’m smarter for it– if I feel like something isn’t right, I won’t ever ignore it again like I did with the dizziness, sluggishness, and friends’ voiced concerns in high school.
My body is amazing, and that’s why I honor it every single day: with healthy foods (but only if they’re also delicious), with enjoyable exercise, and–above all–with plenty of good-quality rest.
Edit: Yes, I know there are a lot of disgusting rumors circulating about me online. For my own sanity, I’ve blocked some of the worst gossip sites so I can’t look at what the trolls are saying anymore. The rumors I saw in the past were either half-truths or (more often) full-blown, hurtful, and seriously ridiculous lies made up by people who have never even met me. There’s not a way to edit the stuff said on other sites—and it’s a free country so people have a right to say what they want. But please remember to consider the source when you read something. Anyone can say anything online, but that doesn’t make it true. If you’re ever wondering about something, just ask. I’m not trying to be devious or hide anything in my life.
(And yes, I know a lot of people are finding this page because Google decided to give out “chocolate covered katie anorexic” and “chocolate covered katie eating disorder” as suggested search terms. Unfortunately I can’t do anything about that either; it’s self-perpetuating. People are always going to click on it out of curiosity.)
Oh Katie!
I am so glad you are okay and so glad you learned how to properly takecare of you before you got seriously hurt!
Thanks for sharing this! I think that when we’re young, we automatically take our health for granted. I mean, how many high schoolers really think they can develop a potentially serious health problem? I’m glad you found out and took care of it before it really affected you. You’ve obviously found a healthy (and delicious!) way of eating that works for you, so that’s all that matters now 🙂
Really nice post!
When I had anorexia, I got incredibly thin and even though people kind of knew something was wrong, they didn’t say anything [except my parents]. It is hard to remember much of anything during that time because I was in such a fog (since I was underweight & undereating). The hospital I went to for inpatient, just made me more confused by feeding me sugar all the time…I had to eat Fruit Loops right before bed and hfcs-laden milk…yuck!
When I discovered these blogs, such as yours, I realised that healthy people DO eat well and don’t starve themselves to stay a normal weight. Even though now, I STILL have problems with my sugar intake and binging, I feel so much better eating rounded, whole, healthy meals rather than a just a half of sweet potato for dinner. I am not free from my eating disorder but slowly I am getting out of disordered eating.
Thanks for blogging & helping me eat better:)
Katie, I’m so glad you shared this! Your story is all too familiar because literally the EXACT same thing happened to me! I didn’t used to run longdistance track until my freshman year the distance coach saw me (he saw I was skinny and tall too!) and asked me to join the team. Like you, I was immediately hooked and pretty good too. But then my weight dropped and got to a scccarrry scary scary low weight! I felt tired all the time and didn’t know what was wrong so I had my mom schedule me a doctors appointment. That’s when I found out my hr was 48 (but since I’m an athlete it wasn’t terrible) but my weight was way too low. I’ve been incorpoarting as much food into my diet ever since then as possible (2 years later!) and still working to gain back that weight. It’s really hard when your body literally just burns it off! Anyway, thanks for sharing your story and hope you enjoyed mine haha 🙂
I did enjoy yours! Seriously, you have no idea how happy I am to know I wasn’t alone (although I’m sad others have gone through similar situations).
hi katie,
i don’t have a blog, but i read yours all the time. i never comment, but i have to today. this post was awesome, and i’m so glad you were able to share it with us, because i bet a lot of people have gone through similar things, especially judging by the comments people are leaving, but no one realizes just how many others have gone through the same thing.
for example, me. i didn’t have any idea that anyone else was in the same boat as me. when i was younger, i was just like you in that i was always so busy and sometimes forgot to eat properly because i didn’t have enough time or just didn’t care about food. unfortunately for me, i lost so much weight that it turned into an ed because my brain got all messed up and i started associating not eating with feeling powerful and in control. they say that a starved brain can make anyone turn eating disordered, even if they weren’t previously disposed to it. and that’s what happened to me, so it was harder to get out of it, and i’m still working on it. but blogs, especially honest ones like yours, have helped me so much. so keep doing what you’re doing and sharing with us. it helps more than you’ll ever know!
thank you so much for sharing Katie :). It’s nothing to be emberassed about, really! You didn’t take your health for granted as I see it, you were young and unknowing. at that age, most people take their health ‘for granted’.
I still sometimes feel guilty, or rather stupid, for really taking my health for granted with my eating disorder. but I also realize, again, this wasn’t on purpose. and we’ve come out stronger and wiser indeed 🙂
Katie, you are amazing. I think it is SO brave of you for sharing this, and what you went through sounds so scary!! You are so inspirational for so many reasons, but most of all for your positive outlook on life.
I did my heart a favour this morning. I gave it some love CCK-style with some red velvet pancakes 🙂
LOVE YOU girlie, and thanks for being SUCH an INSPIRATION to me! 😀
Ahhh you made the pancakes?! How much do I love you, girl? Almost enough to get on the next plane to the UK to visit, even though I’m terrified of flying. I need to meet you!
Love from your stalker ;).
Aww to both of you!!! This comment section is full of love!!!
Thanks for sharing this with us, Katie!! Heart health is nothing to take lightly. My father and grandfather both died from heart attacks, so being on the opposite end of the weight spectrum (overweight!), I, too, keep my heart health in mind all. the. time, especially now that I’m over 30.
This is an excellent reminder to be good to your heart (and body), and to never take any of it for granted. 🙂
XOXO
Hi sweetie! Thankyou for sharing your story with us. One day I hope that I will find the strength to share mine too 🙂 lots of love xoxo
Thanks Katie! Great post. I really am enjoying reading everyone’s responses, too, because (like a lot of others have said), it’s making me feel less alone! Unlike you, I did have an eating disorder, but it caused me to also have a heart problem as well as loads of other health issues. I’m slowly working out of them!
I think if a doctor told me I had to see a cardiologist, just going there alone would be enough to scare me into having a heart problem! You hear “heart” and it sounds so scary, because that’s SUCH a vital organ. So glad it all turned out for you :).
Great post, as usual, Katie. Although I’ve never had such a similar experience, I felt like I was right there with you, from the vivid way you wrote about your story. Definitely makes me think twice about how I treat my body and what I put into it. What a great way of looking at it: your body is a temple. Treat it that way. Thanks for the reminder!
Katie! Thank you for sharing your story!! That is scary, but I’m glad it turned out ok. And now you know better, so it’s nothing to be embarrassed about!
Thank you so much for sharing this story. I’m sure that was so scary to go through as a teenager. That is why it’s SO important to educate kids on nutrition and how to properly fuel their bodies. Heck, we have to educate ADULTS on this too!
I had a mini heart scare as well with a mummer. I was scared to even walk fast!
Glad it was nothing seriouss!
Katie you are so brave and thank you for sharing this! For the love of god don’t be embarrassed you were young and didn’t know any better. It just goes to show the damage poor nutrition can have on our bodies.
I have been battling an ED for a number of years and have had numerous scary moments with regard to heart health and it really does make you stop in your tracks.
You are a true inspiration for turning things round and I am so glad you are okay. This week I will be making myself a single lady carrot cupcake 😀 cannot wait!
Keep up the great work angel 🙂
Aw thanks, Amy! I hope you love the carrot cake!! 🙂