If you have a special diet, does this sound familiar?
You receive an invitation to a wedding, and the RSVP portion asks you to check off one of two things: chicken or fish. Well, obviously vegetarians do not want to be served chicken or fish. And people with allergies or special dietary needs also can’t eat just anything. What do you do?
A. Grumble a bunch, and then check off one or the other
B. Eschew going to the wedding altogether …
Skip the wedding? How sad would that be?
A few months ago, I wrote about how I was once a bit embarrassed about my diet. While this is definitely no longer the case, I still try not to call attention to my veganism when out with friends, family, or other non-vegans. I don’t want anyone to feel awkward, and also, sometimes it’s not all about me! Sometimes, I just don’t feel like getting into the debate, ya know? I want to talk about things other than my culinary inclinations.
In my eight years as a vegan, I’ve learned that the best way to ensure you’ll get some vegan grub, hassle-free, is to call ahead. This is a good strategy for three reasons: One, you don’t have to call attention to yourself or seem “high maintenance” when the waiter is taking orders. Two, if they can’t accommodate your diet, you have time to make different arrangements. Three, it’s courteous to give the chef a heads-up so he/she can be better prepared. Plus, you’ll probably end up with something yummier if the chef knows in advance about your diet and is therefore able to brainstorm a meal for you.
By calling ahead, for the wedding I recently attended, I was rewarded with an amazing, gourmet meal: Perfectly-grilled zucchini, eggplant, yellow squash, peppers, tomato, and portabella mushrooms drizzled with a balsamic reduction so sweet I’m still dreaming about it.
I was lucky this time. However, it’s always a good idea to have a back-up plan, just in case. My backup plan for this particular occasion was a bunch of nuts thrown into my purse, if all I was served was an iceberg salad. True, nuts and salad aren’t an ideal dinner. But I believe food isn’t the most important thing in life. What’s more important? Friends, family, and dancing all night! That, and cute party favors like these Love Beyond Measure spoons:
Cute or what?!
Are you always prepared with food in your purse?
And have you ever had a restaurant meal specially made for you?
I always carry some sort of energy bar, fruit, or nuts in my purse or backpack. My friends love me for it; when they get hungry, they know where to turn. Unfortunately, that means I have to routinely remember to restock!
I found from experience that when people are hosting a party, etc., they feel better knowing that they can accomadate everyone. They want everyone to have a good time and if they find out that you are not eating because of being vegan or something they always say “you should have told us”. Your meal at the wedding looks really good.
I’ve been to a few events where I’ve had to let them know I was vegan and last Mother’s Day we let the chef at the restaruant know my son and I were vegan and we had an awesome meal! Just last spring my husband and I went to a 5 course vineyard luncheon and my vegan meal was actually better than everyone else’s. I got lots of ooohs and awes! My husband said he should have requested a vegan meal as well.
Your party idea sounds like so much fun!
People always say that to me too! (that they wished they’d ordered the vegan meal)
I think part of it has to do with the fact that regular meals can be prepared by just anyone, but usually the head chef will take care of the special orders, meaning they’ll be superior ’cause they were made by the best! 🙂
You and your cousins have the most beautiful smiles – the proof that you’ve all had a good time at this wedding 🙂 .
I am not vegan but I am really picky sometimes and if I know prior to the event that I won’t eat the food, I bring something with me. If I don’t know, well… I just don’t eat. In the end the food isn’t the most important thing there 🙂 .
And yes, those measuring spoons are super cute. They look like a great present for a celebration of love.
I always call ahead, too. I know some people are worried about being annoying but I think a lot of time the host wants to be helpful and give you something you’ll like so I let them know no matter where I’m going, if it’s a wedding or a small dinner party.
Apples are my fave to-go food!
I always have snacks in my purse since having kids. 🙂 You seriously could make a meal out of my purse at times: pistachios, Lara Bars, cheerios are a staple and there is often a small apple or banana too. Oh, and a dum dum. Yes it’s candy, but it can do wonders in keeping a squirmy two year old in the cart so you can finish your grocery shopping, after the iPod has lost its novelty.
I like your attitude about food not being the most important thing. In your situation, the wedding was the most important thing at that moment and I’m so glad you weren’t going to let a meal keep you from enjoying the celebration. Lucky for you, you got a great meal to boot!
We had all vegan groomsmen and a lot of vegan guests at my wedding, so we had vegan options in the meal and also vegan versions of each dessert! I think it is important to accommodate all diets. My vegan friends typically have to settle to eat little to nothing when we go places with set menus. I didn’t want them to have to do that!
1) you’re awesome!
2) my friends who’ve gotten hitched since I’ve been vegan and my brother all made sure there was vegan food for me at the reception. I was very touched that they even bothered. I wouldn’t have expected it but it was nice. The meals were okay. Very small and mostly the oh so common Grilled Vegetable Plate (’cause that’s all vegans eat…) No vegan dessert, of course, but that’s what a purse is for! I actually flew to Jamaica for my bestie’s wedding with chocolate, Clif Builder Bars, Laras and some cookies in my luggage. A week without something baked and/or sugary sweet is NOT my idea of a good time. LOL. I can only eat so much fruit before it starts to affect my tummy.
Also, Katie, your post reminded me of this blog:
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/ezra-klein/2010/04/down_with_the_gvp.html
I do agree with him and will rant at length about how some caterers/chefs are just completely sad and uncreative when it comes to cooking for vegans(!) Honestly, we settle for very little. Usually I’m just like “yay! hot food I can eat!” *devours plain baked potato* Shouldn’t chefs be raising the bar? It’s not hard to make really good vegan food with common kitchen ingredients! I’ve had chefs really go all out and make FANTASTIC vegan dishes and I’ve had some truly sad, pathetic attempts that made me a bit grumpy. I dunno, I don’t think it’s too much to ask that when I go to a restaurant, I can eat! And not in tiny bird-like portions. 😉 Events like weddings are different, IMO. Food isn’t a huge deal and you can always eat in the hotel room or after the event.
Usually I’m just like “yay! hot food I can eat!”
Too cute, Melissa! But too true, as well. It doesn’t take much of an effort to make us happy. Any attempt at an effort makes me think, “Wow, I’m touched they really thought about me,” even if the thought is as simple as thinking to bring hummus to a party along with a cheese dip so I’ll have something too.
Trail mix and peanut butter packets are lifesavers when you don’t have a lot of control over what you eat. Trail mix is also great for sprucing up salad!
The spoon is so cute!! Did you get it from a friend??
Yes, I always have some sort of bar (usually luna or lara), because I’ll never know if I can find food!
I’ve never had a restaurant make something special for me. I don’t eat out often, so that saves the hassel 🙂
I have a question for you. How strict of a vegan are you? Do you cut some slacks from time to time? (ie: you eat butter if it’s smothered on that bread that you ordered) I’m seeing so many vegans who are like that recently, so I was wondering what you do! If you can answer this for me, that’d be very helpful. Thank you! <3
The spoons were the party favors.
I guess I’m pretty strict in that I wouldn’t eat something like buttered bread or the cake. But if I accidentally eat something non-vegan (i.e. they told m it was vegan, but they were wrong), I won’t fret about it too much.
OOOHHHH CUTEST measuring spoons EVA! When there is a potluck, we bring a dish that will be a meal for my mom and I, and possibly something extra as a side dish. It’s a lot harder for us, as we have the gluten allergy, and even if someone happily tells us “oh, this is vegan!” we have to decline because of the pasta, bread, etc. When it’s it’s party, I might eat ahead, but most of my friends know what foods I can eat and plan accordingly. It’s great! And yes, I do generally bring something with me, like my entree or a snack. And when in doubt, fruit salads at parties are my standby!
PLEASE can we have a party. YES YES YES!!!!!!!!! We could all have a BIG sleepover and bring al of our cool recipes!!
VEGirl
I’ve been reading your blog for a while but never commented, but I had to because I have the same measuring spoons and almost the same exact photo on my blog, it made me laugh. I’m not vegan, but I don’t eat meat or dairy, and limit my gluten intake, but because I eat fish it does make weddings a little easier for me. But I am def. on the same page as you with food not being everything, my best memories aren’t meals I had, it’s the people who I had those meals with!
Hey Liz!
*Waves*
Spoon twins!! 🙂
Man-that is so great that you had that meal made for you! It looks so yummy!! I’ve never had someone do that for me, I get a little embarrassed asking (and high-maintenance…).
But I always have back-up food in my purse! Usually nuts and an apple or something.
P.S-You have such a beautiful family! Your cousins and you look adorable in those pretty dresses!
Aww thanks! I agree that my family is beautiful… my cousins could seriously be models (not just the ones in the photo, but all my cousins). Only problem? I’m the only one of us who’s over 5’3! Haha my dad is the tallest of my entire extended family… and he’s 5’8. My grandpa was 5’1 :). So cute!