If you have a special diet, does this sound familiar?
You receive an invitation to a wedding, and the RSVP portion asks you to check off one of two things: chicken or fish. Well, obviously vegetarians do not want to be served chicken or fish. And people with allergies or special dietary needs also can’t eat just anything. What do you do?
A. Grumble a bunch, and then check off one or the other
B. Eschew going to the wedding altogether …
Skip the wedding? How sad would that be?
A few months ago, I wrote about how I was once a bit embarrassed about my diet. While this is definitely no longer the case, I still try not to call attention to my veganism when out with friends, family, or other non-vegans. I don’t want anyone to feel awkward, and also, sometimes it’s not all about me! Sometimes, I just don’t feel like getting into the debate, ya know? I want to talk about things other than my culinary inclinations.
In my eight years as a vegan, I’ve learned that the best way to ensure you’ll get some vegan grub, hassle-free, is to call ahead. This is a good strategy for three reasons: One, you don’t have to call attention to yourself or seem “high maintenance” when the waiter is taking orders. Two, if they can’t accommodate your diet, you have time to make different arrangements. Three, it’s courteous to give the chef a heads-up so he/she can be better prepared. Plus, you’ll probably end up with something yummier if the chef knows in advance about your diet and is therefore able to brainstorm a meal for you.
By calling ahead, for the wedding I recently attended, I was rewarded with an amazing, gourmet meal: Perfectly-grilled zucchini, eggplant, yellow squash, peppers, tomato, and portabella mushrooms drizzled with a balsamic reduction so sweet I’m still dreaming about it.
I was lucky this time. However, it’s always a good idea to have a back-up plan, just in case. My backup plan for this particular occasion was a bunch of nuts thrown into my purse, if all I was served was an iceberg salad. True, nuts and salad aren’t an ideal dinner. But I believe food isn’t the most important thing in life. What’s more important? Friends, family, and dancing all night! That, and cute party favors like these Love Beyond Measure spoons:
Cute or what?!
Are you always prepared with food in your purse?
And have you ever had a restaurant meal specially made for you?
I always carry some sort of energy bar, fruit, or nuts in my purse or backpack. My friends love me for it; when they get hungry, they know where to turn. Unfortunately, that means I have to routinely remember to restock!
I’ll always bring a Larabar if I don’t know how feasible food options will be where I’m going… but yes, I do ask for a vegetable platter if all else fails. though I find that usually a menu item can at least be modified enough to accommodate my prefs. thankfully, my friends already know about my food peculiarities and don’t mind too much… I think 😉
It’s so funny to me to see a post like this (which I can totally relate to) and to compare it to the “self-righteous vegan” stereotype; most vegans I know, including myself, far from being pushy and demanding are actually rather timid about their food choices and hate drawing attention to it. I agree, it’s not about shame, just about not wanting to constantly have their dietary choices be the center of attention and the object of scrutiny. But as veganism becomes ever more accepted into mainstream culture, hopefully the “chicken or fish” menus of the world will expand.
WOW what a sweet meal they prepared for you.
my son was sitting on my lap and saw it …started giggling …and said…Es a spider.
he’s a goof.
being a mom I am always stocking snacks for him (and than me too) in my purse or his go bag (which is most often my purse)
I think It’s just good planning because you never know when you are gonna get stuck somewhere.
I also am a stickler for a 5 pm snack because I commute home and then have to cook dinner and don’t want to be famished.
I love your take on planning ahead! GOOD FOR YOU
Hahahahhaa awww too cute! Yeah, the photo does not do the taste justice at all!
“I don’t want anyone to feel awkward, and also, sometimes it’s not all about me! Sometimes, I just don’t feel like getting into the debate, ya know? I want to talk about things other than my culinary inclinations.”–
AMEN!!!
As proud as i am about my own path, others dont share this path and so it only brings attn to the fact that Im different, many want to “Debate” and sorry, sex politics religion and DIETARY PATHS are not fun for dinner table conversation, at all! I truly try to avoid the fact that I have a food blog, that I am vegan, that I dont eat gluten, etc etc…they dont get it and I dont care to talk about it. I’d rather talk about anything!!! other than this..after talking about it nonstop on, oh yeah, my blog 🙂
I neevr had a specific meal like that made for me, it looks yum! i usually have some sort of food in my bag along with a sports drink, tea bags and a squeezy bottle of honey,plaster and hairpins! ha, mary poppins i am with my over sized and well equipt handbag!
Great idea to call ahead! I usually just hope that there will some tasty vegetable side dishes or bring something to munch on in my purse.
That’s great that they accommodated for you, looks great too! I often bring back up snacks as I don’t want anyone to feel like they need to go out of their way. Besides, I am always lugging my own water around already. 😉
You gotta do what you gotta do! Glad you had a great time. I also ALWAYS have sniggity snacks on me. 😉
girl you’d have loved the GoGreen Conference i was at this past tuesday – their two lunch options were turkey or vegan. not vegetarian but vegan. and the tempeh sandwich was so insanely good 🙂
those heart shaped measuring spoons are BEYONDDDD cute! I totally want them! Mine are just plain hahah- although they do work! 🙂
I’ve never had a vegan meal made especially for me in a restaurant, but I have had to send back things (ie. at prom, which was dismal). If I know I’m going to be at a very meat-y place, and I’m only going for the company, I’ll usually just eat ahead of time. Most of my friends are ok with that, even if it can be a bit awkward. Other times I eat ahead and order something small to “blend in” a bit more.
ahhh i’m so jealous of your measuring spoons!
okay, those measuring spoons ARE A MUST!! wouldnt they be great for a valentines gift too, for someone who loves baking!!!
i definitely can understand the embarrassment or fear that would associate non-vegan food gatherings like weddings. its very complicated and like you said, it wasent something that u felt comfortable with in the beginning. but now that u know just how important vegan is to you and your life, u dont feel timid about sharing how loving the lifestyle is and that u arent out to ‘change’ other peoples views, just be a glowing example of how much the lifestyle completes you, and allows you the freedom to live guiltless in the world <3 <3 i love that!!
Ohhhh love thoes lil measuring spoons!
Amen to the akward eating situations. I’m vegan and also allergic to wheat. Its easy to prepare food for myself, but near impossible to explain what I eat to other non-foodie people…chefs included!
I also agree with you- unless somebody asks and is really interested, I’d rather just skip the discussion of what I do or don’t eat all together! I usually just leave it at “I eat what makes me feel good.” Life is about so much more than food, and while I loveeeee food (LOVE), I’d rather not talk about it all day or make people feel awk.
I do the same-keep lots and lots of snacks in my purse, soccer-mom style. Always nuts, usually a piece of fruit or meal bar too.
I was in the bridal party for my best friend last summer, and totally just munched from a bag of almonds in my purse. She’s my bestie, so she understood, and honestly nobody else even noticed. Too much wine was happenin’!!
Thanks for this post-Happy Sunday!
Those spoons rock! How cute. Your family is adorable. 🙂
While we didn’t have a vegan option at our wedding, we did have a veg option and the appetizers included a fruit and veggie tray so at least there was *something* if someone had happened to be. Calling ahead is a great idea. As a bride, I would have been ok getting contacted if there was someone with strict dietary stuff but it worked out pretty well!
Also, Zliten is severly allergic to peanuts/peanut oil (yeah I know…life would SUCK) so we have to be very careful at restaurants (and do a lot of calling ahead), and sometimes it just pops up unexpectedly. We split a square of fudge the other week and bam – he was sick for a day and a half. Who would have expected anything peanut in amaretto fudge?
A few months ago my boyfriend and I went to crater of diamonds state park in Arkansas. It’s the only diamond mine in the U.S where the public can search for diamonds and keep what they find. You fill a big bucket of dirt and sift parts of it in a mesh frame while dunking it in a bath of water. We didn’t find anything but on our drive home Greg came up with the best proposal idea! To place a diamond ring in the bucket of dirt so when a girl rinses it she finds a diamond! I thought that was so cute but I was also mad that a) he didn’t do this for me!!! and b) he told me so he can’t do it in the future!! lol
Katie, I think we are about the same age and I agree with you that it’s so wierd when friends start getting engaged/married! I feel way too young for this!
Aww well I bet if he’s creative enough to come up with that, he has something even BETTER in store for real life :).